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Typical man – starts sneezing and
he’s got flu! Or Thank God he’s not here; he
can’t write about us! Mid Lancs
Cross Country, Saturday, 11th November
2006 |
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A bit of a cold over the weekend put
me out of action for this one, so I am probably best placed of everyone in the
club to report accurately on the event!
A total of 32 athletes, (if I’ve read the results
correctly), attended for the first fixture this season in proper cross country
conditions. Capt’n Young said I
should be safe if I mentioned mud, and knowing this course I’m sure there were
lots!
When Brenda puts the slide show together I’d
like to suggest ‘Mud, Mud, Glorious Mud’ as the background music.
This next bit
is just for Peter Cruse because he
thinks I never talk about the race. If I’d been there I probably wouldn’t talk
about the race but I need to pad this out somehow.
Anyway, I see that no-one ‘Pass’ed Charlie. Alex put his club before country and did this instead of
an international event. Capt’n Barlow
beat Karl Lee, (more of Karl in a minute). In all, 22 men toed the line. Special mention
of Jonathan Lawson who I believe
feels he has to run this every year because his dad, Richard, puts a huge amount of work in every year to stage the
event. THANK YOU Richard.
I see that Karl decided to run this instead of
going to Huddersfield to watch 
I have some
questions about the event:
Q1. Where was Les Cornwall?
a) Was
it that he remembered last year when he got his cream trousers and white trainers
dirty?
b) Was he busy with his harem?
Q2. What were Steve Myerscough and Martin Bates doing so far down the
results?
a) Injuries?
b) Too much beer?
c) Too little beer?
d) Did they do a “Les” and stop to change their shoes after the first lap??
Q3. How
did you get on with the tent? In my absence did you beat the 18 mins 22 seconds
it took us last week to get it
all the way up?
Q4. Where was John
Whiteman? Having muscled his way into the last report, complete with photo,
the least he could have done was turn up! Oh, no, I’ve mentioned him again so
that probably means another photo of him in this report! Perhaps he’ll finish
the season as the ‘Most photographed man never to run a cross country!’
Q5. Were
you OK for food afterwards? I notice that Capt’n
Murphy is not on the results so perhaps she wasn’t there so perhaps you
didn’t get any food afterwards.
Q6.
Capt’n Russell, how did you keep your cream designer bag clean in all that
mud?
Q7. Was Haley up until
5am again this week? If she was, it scored another load of points for the mud
sweat and spikes award.
I should have
been there then I wouldn’t be sitting here now worrying about all these things!
Well done to our resident ‘wasp tamer’, Kath, on being our first lady home. She
really does know how to sting the opposition! By the way Kath, I’ve made a she-pee out of a funnel, a piece of hosepipe and
a Morrison’s carrier bag! It needs
some modification because the carrier bag has holes in the bottom!
Twelve ladies
turned out to get very wet and muddy so well
done to you all. I didn’t see Ann’s
name on the ladies results. Perhaps she was put off by the conversations at the
back of the bus last week!!
Well there you have it. A report
written from my sick bed. I know now how George
Kennedy felt throughout his long lay-off through injury. I too, have
received no flowers, grapes or get well cards. I did get a text message from Capt’n Young wishing me a speedy
recovery. Ha! Me, speedy! You’re havin’ a laugh?
The next
fixture is on Saturday 25th
November, the day of our own race and it calls for you being in one of two
main groups: those who are fast enough to run 10K in around 35 minutes or faster, thus giving you time to get to
As for
myself, I expect, (so long as I get over this flu – note how it has progressed!) to be a
Written by: Brian Porter (from his sick bed – aahhh bless)
Submitted: 12th November 2006
Edited by: Brenda J Earnshaw WRR Editor